I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Randomize