How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Randomize
