Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
