I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
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