You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
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