In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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