He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
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