I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
