I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
