how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
