she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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