Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
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