But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Still dying that you shit outside
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize
