I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
