didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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