I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
sarcasm needs its own font
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
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