People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize
