me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
