I didn't shave. On purpose
I wish i was in the wii world.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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