Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
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My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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