You're my little dorito
shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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