That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
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