What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
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