You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Randomize