Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
My penis needs a shock collar
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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