Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
His hands were made for my vagina.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize
