we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Randomize
