I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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