what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Randomize
