omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
