I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
