I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize