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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize