I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
