People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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