He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize
