i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize