I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
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