We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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