Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
