I have demons in me.
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize