Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
