i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
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