sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Randomize
