you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Randomize
