i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
You're like the curious george of whores
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
