I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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