do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
