He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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