Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
Randomize