If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
